#but your heart lies in program development rather than the 1:1

[separatist-apologist]

Sorry! I saw the TS lyrics meme and I didn’t realize it was a joke until after I hit “send.” My bad 😅

Oh! Where I said "a shame she's fucked in the head"! Okay that makes sense!

Don't assume anything about me as a professional, but I provide therapy as part of my job and it was the only lyric I could think of that fit! I will absolutely help patch up the tapestry someone else shred, though!

[todolona]

Transform Your Body with Kaan Fitness: A Journey to Weight Loss Success

In the bustling world of fitness and wellness, finding the right guidance can be the key to achieving your goals effectively. One such beacon of transformation is Kaan Fitness, renowned for its dedicated weight loss coaching programs. Led by seasoned fitness experts, Kaan Fitness has carved a niche for itself in the realm of personalized fitness solutions, helping individuals not only shed excess pounds but also adopt a sustainable, healthy lifestyle.

Meet Your Coach: Passion and Expertise Combined

At the heart of Kaan Fitness lies its team of passionate coaches, each equipped with a wealth of knowledge and a commitment to client success. The weight loss coach at Kaan Fitness are more than just trainers; they are mentors who understand that every individual's journey is unique. They tailor their approach to suit your specific needs, ensuring that you receive personalized attention and support every step of the way.

The Kaan Fitness Approach: Holistic and Customized

What sets Kaan Fitness apart is its holistic approach to weight loss. Rather than promoting quick fixes or one-size-fits-all solutions, their programs focus on sustainable lifestyle changes. Whether you're looking to lose weight, build muscle, or improve overall fitness, Kaan Fitness crafts a plan that integrates nutrition, exercise, and mindset coaching.

1. Personalized Nutrition Plans: Your coach will work closely with you to develop a nutrition plan that not only supports your weight loss goals but also fits seamlessly into your lifestyle. From meal planning to nutritional education, you'll gain the knowledge and tools to make informed choices about your diet.

2. Effective Exercise Regimens: Exercise is a crucial component of any weight loss journey, and Kaan Fitness designs workout routines tailored to your fitness level and preferences. Whether you prefer cardio, strength training, or a combination of both, your coach will ensure that you stay motivated and on track.

3. Mindset Coaching: Achieving lasting weight loss requires more than just physical changes—it requires a shift in mindset. Kaan Fitness incorporates mindset coaching to help you overcome obstacles, build resilience, and cultivate a positive attitude towards health and wellness.

Success Stories: Real People, Real Results

The true measure of any fitness program lies in its success stories. At Kaan Fitness, clients rave about their transformative experiences, citing not only significant weight loss but also improved energy levels, confidence, and overall well-being. From busy professionals to stay-at-home parents, people from all walks of life have found success with Kaan Fitness.

How to Get Started

Embarking on your weight loss journey with Kaan Fitness is straightforward. Begin by scheduling a consultation with one of their expert coaches, who will assess your goals, lifestyle, and preferences. Together, you'll create a personalized plan that sets you on the path to achieving your desired results.

Join the Kaan Fitness Community

Beyond individual coaching sessions, Kaan Fitness fosters a supportive community where members can connect, share experiences, and celebrate milestones. Whether online or in-person, you'll find encouragement and motivation from like-minded individuals who are committed to their health and fitness goals.

Conclusion: Your Journey Starts Here

If you're ready to take charge of your health and transform your body, Kaan Fitness offers the guidance and support you need. With a dedicated team of coaches, a holistic approach to weight loss, and a track record of success, Kaan Fitness is your partner in achieving sustainable, long-term results. Embrace the journey towards a healthier, fitter you—because at Kaan Fitness, your goals are within reach.Ready to get started? Visit Kaan Fitness today and embark on your path to weight loss success. Your body will thank you for it!

[fifaworldcup2026tickets]

Brazil FIFA World Cup: Brazil's Football in Crisis No Longer the Beautiful Game

Brazil FIFA World Cup: Brazilian football, once synonymous with excellence and creativity, has gradually declined over the past few decades. Historically, Brazil has been a powerhouse in international football, winning the FIFA World Cup five times and producing legendary players like Pelé, Zico, Romário, Ronaldo, and Ronaldinho. These players dominated the sport and defined it, bringing flair, innovation, and a unique style known as 'Jogo bonito' or 'the beautiful game.'

Secure your spot at the upcoming FIFA World Cup with Eticketing.co, the trusted online platform for purchasing tickets. Gain access to exclusive Brazil Football World Cup Tickets for Switzerland. Stay informed about ticket availability by subscribing to alerts.

However, the decline began subtly in the early 2000s and became more apparent recently. Factors contributing to this decline include economic instability, mismanagement at both the club and national levels and an exodus of talent to FIFA World Cup 2026. The country's football infrastructure, once the envy of the world, has failed to keep pace with modern developments. Consequently, Brazilian clubs have struggled in international competitions, and the national team has underperformed in recent Football World Cup and Copa América tournaments.

The turning point for many was the humiliating 7-1 defeat to Germany in the 2014 FIFA World Cup semi-final, held on home soil. This loss not only shattered the nation's footballing pride but also exposed deep-rooted issues within the system. Subsequent performances have been inconsistent, and the once-feared Brazilian team no longer strikes the same level of dread in opponents. To understand the current crisis, it's crucial to delve into the myriad problems plaguing Brazilian football today.

Brazilian Football's Uphill Battle Mismanagement, and Talent Drain

At the heart of Brazil's FIFA World Cup woes lies a pervasive culture of corruption and mismanagement. The Brazilian Football Confederation (CBF) has been plagued by scandals, with several high-ranking officials implicated in corruption cases. This has eroded trust in the governing body and hindered effective leadership. The misuse of funds and lack of transparency have diverted resources away from crucial areas such as youth development, infrastructure, and grassroots programs.

Secure your place at the highly anticipated Football World Cup Tickets by using our trusted online platform, Eticketing.co. Ensure your tickets through us, your most dependable source for booking and updates on the upcoming tournament.

Corruption extends beyond the CBF to club management as well. Many Brazilian clubs are financially mismanaged, with many accruing massive debts. Poor financial oversight and prioritizing short-term success over sustainable growth have led to a lack of long-term vision. Consequently, clubs often sell their best talents to Brazil FIFA World Cup to balance the books, depriving the domestic league of quality and continuity.

Mismanagement has also affected the quality of coaching and player development. There is a noticeable gap between the training methodologies employed in Brazil and those in top European academies. While Brazil has always been rich in raw talent, the failure to nurture and develop this talent domestically has been a significant setback. The focus on immediate results rather than building a robust footballing structure has left Brazilian football lagging behind its global counterparts.

Lastly, it is crucial to create a sustainable financial model for clubs. This involves not only managing finances better but also finding ways to retain top talent within the domestic league. Offering competitive wages and creating a more attractive league through better marketing and fan engagement can help reduce the talent drain in Brazil FIFA World Cup.

The Talent Drain: Brazil's Struggle to Retain Its Best Players

One of the most significant factors contributing to the decline of Brazilian football is the exodus of talented players to Europe and other parts of the FIFA World Cup. While this trend has been ongoing for decades, its impact has become more pronounced in recent years. Young Brazilian players are often scouted and signed by Brazil FIFA World Cup at a very early age, sometimes before they even make a significant mark in the domestic league.

Football enthusiasts worldwide are eagerly anticipating tickets for the FIFA World Cup. To experience the excitement firsthand, secure your FIFA World Cup Tickets through our online platform, Eticketing.co. Don't miss the opportunity to be part of one of football's most thrilling tournaments.

This talent drain has several implications. Firstly, it weakens the Brazilian league, making it less competitive and less attractive to fans. The departure of top players means that domestic clubs struggle to maintain a high standard of football, which in turn affects the development of other players who miss out on the opportunity to play alongside and learn from the best.

Moreover, the financial incentives for young players to move abroad are overwhelming. European clubs offer significantly higher wages and better facilities, which Brazilian clubs cannot match. This creates a vicious cycle where the best talents leave, reducing the overall quality of the league, which in turn makes it harder for clubs to generate revenue.

The long-term effect of this exodus is a weakened national team. While individual talents like Neymar and Vinícius Júnior continue to shine, the overall depth and cohesion of the national squad have suffered. The reliance on young players who ply their trade abroad means that the team often lacks the unity and understanding that comes from players growing and playing together domestically.

The Decline of Brazilian Football Historical Context

The foundation of any successful footballing nation lies in its infrastructure and youth development programs. Unfortunately, Brazil has fallen behind in both these areas. The state of football infrastructure in the country is far from ideal, with many stadiums, training facilities, and academies in disrepair. This hampers the development of young players who do not have access to world-class facilities to hone their skills.

Global fans are eagerly awaiting FIFA World Cup tickets. To experience the excitement firsthand, secure your FIFA World Cup Final Tickets through our online platform, Eticketing.co. Don't miss the opportunity to be part of one of football's most thrilling tournaments.

Youth development programs in Brazil have also been found wanting. While there are numerous academies and clubs across the country, the quality and consistency of training vary widely. Many young talents are discovered through informal means rather than through a structured scouting and development system. This leads to many potential stars slipping through the cracks, never receiving the training and opportunities they need to succeed.

Furthermore, there is a lack of investment in grassroots football. Local leagues and school competitions, which serve as the breeding grounds for future stars, do not receive adequate support. This is in stark contrast to countries like Germany and Spain, where significant investments in grassroots football have paid off handsomely.

The coaching standards at the youth level are another concern. Many coaches in Brazil are not equipped with the latest knowledge and techniques, and there is a general reluctance to adopt modern coaching methodologies. This results in young players not developing the tactical and technical acumen required to compete at the highest levels. As a result, Brazilian players often lag behind their Brazil FIFA World Cup in terms of tactical awareness and discipline.

Reclaiming the Glory: Strategies to Revitalize Brazilian Football

Despite the numerous challenges, there is hope for Brazilian football to reclaim its former glory. The path to recovery, however, requires a multifaceted approach and a collective effort from all stakeholders involved. First and foremost, tackling corruption and ensuring transparency within the CBF and club management is essential. Implementing stricter regulations and oversight can help rebuild trust and ensure that resources are utilized effectively for the development of the sport.

Investing in infrastructure is another crucial step. Modernizing stadiums, training facilities, and academies will provide young players with the environment they need to thrive. This investment should be couple with a renewed focus on youth development programs. Establishing a structured and consistent system for scouting and nurturing talent from a young age will ensure that the best players are identifie and given the training they need.

Grassroots football should receive significant attention. Encouraging local leagues and school competitions will help broaden the talent pool and provide more opportunities for young players to showcase their skills. Collaboration with international clubs and academies can also bring. In new ideas and methodologies, helping to modernize the FIFA World Cup.

Enhancing coaching standards is another vital aspect. Investing in the education and development of coaches will ensure that young players receive high-quality training. Embracing modern coaching techniques and fostering a culture of continuous learning. Coaches can bridge the gap between Brazilian and European training methodologies.

For fans eagerly anticipating attending FIFA 2026 matches, eticketing.co offers a diverse array of FIFA World Cup 2026 Tickets. Our platform collaborates with the most reputable sellers. On the secondary market, guaranteeing access to top-quality ticket listings from across the web. Explore our Football World Cup selection today to find the most affordable deals available!

[simplitaught]

Online Learning is the Future of Education: 8 Reasons Why?

With the digitization of almost everything, education is also not lagging behind as many learners opt for personalized e-learning. Covid has abruptly shifted billions of learners out of schools, colleges, and universities and sparked an interest in online learning. Institutions are embracing this change and trying to figure out unique ways to implement virtual education. Thus, online learning is the future of education that lies at the heart of it as more and more students are reaping the benefits of this form of learning.

Distance learning is engaging students and moving towards interactive formats, such as technologies like gamification and augmented reality (AR)/virtual reality (VR). We will discuss some exciting developments in the virtual education sector. But first, let’s look at online learning and its benefits.

What is Online Learning?

Online learning is a form of education that encourages students to learn from anywhere. It helps them acquire knowledge using the latest technologies. Online learning is also called eLearning, distance learning, or Internet learning. It allows learners to develop diverse skills with customized learning.

Advantages of Online Education

The future of online learning has taken center stage, and although it’s tough at first to adapt to the format, there are numerous benefits once learners get the hang of it. Distance learning offers the following advantages

It offers flexibility to pursue your course from anywhere and at any time.

There is a wide range of course and program options.

Students can acquire a broader range of perspectives as learners in online courses are from different countries and backgrounds.

It is affordable and saves time.

It enables students to build their time management skills.

Online learning allows students to communicate with teachers and peers through multiple channels like videoconferencing, emails, etc.

Why Online Learning is the Future of Education?

The top reasons are as follows:

1. Social Learning

We all use social media, and social learning takes its base from these components of human interaction, technology, and group dynamics to make the learning process easier and keep students engaged. Contrary to traditional learning, social learning is about gaining skills and knowledge through technology, interactive videos, and reading books. As a result, it is much more productive, straightforward, and effective than classroom teaching.

2. Adaptive Learning

Adaptive learning is a form of custom learning experience that addresses the unique needs of learners through instant feedback, pathways, and other resources. It offers personalization of courses rather than providing a one-size-fits-all learning model.

3. Artificial Intelligence

The worldwide online learning market was expected to grow to $325 billion by 2025, even before the pandemic. According to many eLearning experts, “an AI-based online learning platform is a system that has the power to maintain and accomplish different tasks requiring human intelligence.” AI can present solutions to human-related problems, such as speech recognition, decision-making, translation, and more.

One of the trademark features of artificial intelligence is the ability to assemble and analyze users’ data every time they interact with edTech tools. This is why online education courses can be designed to become more efficient. Using artificial intelligence technology can help to:

Decide the levels of learning expected of a student.

Aid the users to the next level by providing relevant content.

Assist students by considering their previous experience, knowledge, skills, learning styles, and preferred pace.

4. Video Learning

Video learning refers to learning experiences facilitated by video. It combines camera footage, text, graphics, animation, and audio to create a multisensory learning experience. This efficient learning technique practically demonstrates the subject material, serving as one of the best reasons for students to learn online.

5. Learning Management Systems

Managers usually use a content management system (CMS) to build and store digital information in institutes and schools. Lately, institutions have extended this concept of CMS to eLearning platforms, known as Learning Management Systems (LMS).

LMS offers several benefits as it allows educators and other faculty members to design, document, and register courses and study materials in the software. Thus, eLearning plays a significant role in a technology-based and digitalized education system. Students can go online and study any required course. Using the capabilities of LMS, educators are creating lesson plans and managing practices efficiently, thus getting rid of the old analog ways for the better.

6. Microlearning

Mostly, students are never excited about large and multi-phase projects. So, learners in collaborative classrooms have found a way around this problem. They are splitting learning materials into manageable pieces. The whole process of chunking is known as microlearning. Teachers also break study materials into modules to produce more brilliant and faster retention. For example, they can break a two-hour-long lesson into four 30-minute sessions. Besides improving knowledge retention, microlearning enables learning on the go and supports self-paced education and personalized learning.

7. Customized Learning Experience

Distance learning empowers students to study at their own pace, offering complete flexibility. It aids learners in setting the study time depending on their attention spans. Also, virtual education is customized as per students’ requirements and mastery levels which also helps students to be in a better mental health space. Many online course platforms have a record and save option, where learners can visit the saved sessions later or revise the topic as required.

8. Learning and Development

People have different learning styles and want to study according to their preferred choices. eLearning allows students to learn remotely according to their favored learning style and instructional design principles. Therefore, the future of online learning relies on Learning and Development (L&D) because it helps assess resources and overall course and assists students in learning and developing their skills.

Final Thoughts

There are varied reasons to believe that online learning is the future of education. We have discussed the top reasons in this article why most students undertake remote education and why organizations offer it. Both learners and educators benefit from virtual learning as it gives a better experience. Different educational institutions can develop and utilize e-learning software to bring in more learners and educate them effectively. Online education software aids the majority with accessing virtual study resources and opportunities worldwide.

[choicesenthusiast]

Representation at Pixelberry: The Follow-Up

One year ago, on June 15, 2020, Pixelberry released a statement regarding representation at the company. Here is the LINK to the original blog post, and here was MY RESPONSE. Oh, how naïve and optimistic I was. It contained a list of goals and promises they hoped to accomplish within a year. Well, a year has passed, and here is my attempt to hold PB accountable. I'll be going over the five main points of their representation plan and if they achieved what they promised. All criticisms are about content released after June 15th. Long post beware, but I'm not putting it under a read more because I feel like it's important for all to see.

1. Commitment to diversity of Love Interests - FAIL

We’ve already been moving towards having Love Interests have customizable skin tones. We will continue to do this with some stories, while also having some characters with clear ethnic identities. At the same time when we have multiple love interests of different ethnicities, we are aiming for those Love Interests to have equal game time.

"LIs with customizable skin tones" mean they come in three flavours: white, black, and ambiguously Asian/Latinx interchangeably. So far I have rarely seen an LI as connected to their culture/ethnicity as Rafael Aveiro, and he just talked about his Vovo's food if he ever were on screen. They had many chances with the other OH LIs as well. Even Ayna Seth and Tatum Mendoza were confirmed to be Indian and Filipino, respectively, though FA gets a little leeway, as it was set in a fictional west-European continent.

As for equal game time? I'm sure the biggest example we can all think of was the mess that was Open Heart 3, which was written during the hiatus (which only existed because they were going to straight up kill Rafael in Book 2). Game time was not equal among LIs, and the white male LI was heavily favoured. PB also continues to pay female LIs dirt by giving them no screen time. In addition to that, LGBT+ players, who are consistently underrepresented, receive one (1) unprepared pride month survey, prpbably only because someone asked them about it on Twitter.

This is the meat and potatoes of everything because it's what they're outputting to their audience. It's what the people see. Given that things haven't been going so well lately in this department, consider this promise a big fat fail.

2. More authentic and diverse hairstyles for people of color - QUESTIONABLE

Our team will focus on providing more authentic and representative hairstyles. We are prioritizing these hairstyles outside of our normal book processes and will introduce them in new books as they are ready.

While, yes, they have added two new hairstyles in WEH, they also just took Jade Bonet's hair and recycled it for LoA F!MC. PB recycles all their hair more often than not.

3. More diverse book covers - QUESTIONABLE

This is an initiative we started in January of this year. As a result the number of Black, Latinx, Asian, Native American, Pacific Islander, mixed, and other characters on new book covers increased from 35% of characters in 2019 to 60% characters in the first half of 2020. However, the number of black characters is still not high enough this year. More are already scheduled for books later this year. We will make sure that Black characters are well represented on our covers in the future.

"Diverse" does not just mean by race, but also gender, sexual orientation, etc. FA has the only recent MLM cover. And don't tell me that the FA and LoA covers are any different from each other. The only black characters on covers are Zoey Wade (QB), and Black!Gabe Ricci (LoA) and Bastien (WB), which aren't even their canon races unless you choose them to be. This is the case for many single-LI books, such as Cassian Keane (W:ABR, which technically premiered on Mar. 16, but the sentiment is the same), Sam Dalton (TNA), and Dakota Winchester (WEH). Not to mention the customizable/multi LI books like DS, RT, BaBu2, MTFL, etc. Majority of these covers are just cishet couples delicately cradling each other's bodies or whatever. And we're not even gonna get into how PB literally put the Open Heart LIs in order of their favouritism on Book 3's cover.

4. Writers/Staff - QUESTIONABLE

We will be engaging in professional training on historical and current racism for our writers to ensure more of them have a better understanding and more context for views of diverse characters in Choices. We will also create a program that gives more authority to people of color in the studio to advise writers and artists on more authentic portrayals in both writing and art of black, brown, and minority characters.

A story with a Black-led cast is something I have asked for in the past, but failed to follow-up on. We will very likely start this with a Black-led cast story led by Chelsa, one of Pixelberry's Black writers.

We will increase the number of diverse writers we source for new stories, starting with hiring more Black and Latinx writers to lead the charge.

For all teams at Pixelberry we will actively work to bring in more Black and Latinx candidates with the goal to increase the number of Black and Latinx employees at Pixelberry. Although Pixelberry is over 50% female, on teams where females are not at 50% we will actively work to source more female candidates.

This promise seemed like a copout from the start because we have no way of knowing who works on what at PB unless we very meticulously stalk their LinkedIn or Twitter or whatever. We have no solid statistics except for what they feed us. I do know, however, that they recently let the Ms. Match writers go and were hiring for external writers, but there really is no way of knowing what's going on behind-the-scenes with their 112+ employees, and of course there would be NDAs involved. We are yet to see a book with an all-Black cast, and receive rare development updates with new books. Actually, I think a really good way to promote diversity is to do staff showcases on their social media. Just a way to show the public who's responsible for what. Writers, game devs, the art team, etc. Don't think it'll happen, but it's always a good idea.

5. Donations - QUESTIONABLE

Pixelberry will also be making $100,000 in donations to Black Girls Code, the Black Writers Collective, and the Latinx Writers Collective at Techqueria. Rather than as a lump sum, we will be making these donations over the course of a year to remind us that we are not making short term changes, but are committed to long term sustainable actions. We’ll also be donating up to an additional $100k from profits for this week, 6/15-6/21.

There has been no proof, no receipts, no evidence from PB that they have donated anything to anyone, and as far as we're concerned, their word doesn't mean anything. No news or updates news about it. I would love to believe that they did something, but as you can see, I've become quite the pessimist. BWC still uses PB's old logo (like, pre-Choices) on their sponsors page, and the last interaction they've had with BGC was in 2013. They don't even follow each other on Instagram. In fact, BGC received a huge donation from MacKenzie Scott, formerly Bezos last July. Yes, that billionaire Bezos, and that got coverage from them. Obviously donations don't need to be for publicity, but in this case I think it's important there should be proof. Again, it's really hard to tell with these behind-the-scenes things, but given how PB loves to gloat and hates to keep promises, we can assume that none of this happened.

~~~

So, what's the takeaway? That PB's fallen down the drainhole of shitty content and empty promises and has no intention of climbing out as long as they still make that bank? Seems counterproductive, because good representation gets good feedback and income. They pump out bad books with barebones "representation" if you can call it that, then drop their precious merch and pretend all is fine and dandy. But just as I suspected one year ago, none of this matters, because people forget things, and people move on, and shit gets swept under rugs. Yet, here I am, yelling at a company in a post I for sure doubt they'll see. Because if not me, then who?

@playchoices Your move. It's been your move for a year now. When will you actually make it?

[danny-chase]

The Batfam as Tech Majors

AU where Alfred got tired of watching Bruce slap duct tape on the Batmobile and call it good, so he forced the children into college. He makes each of them complete an internship with Lucius in R and D so they have better knowledge of how the devices that their lives depend on work. Majors/minors/tropes under cut.

Dick:

Mechanical Engineering Major

He was in undeclared engineering for as long as possible

He settled on mechanical because it seemed the most broad

Plus he joined a car club, loved it, and there were a ton of MechE’s there

He ends up taking credit overloads most semesters because he always finds 1-3 random classes that he wants to take

Despite taking everything from advanced computer science classes (he somehow convinces even the most intense professors to let him into their classes) to hyper specific phycology classes, he doesn’t have any minors to show for it

He just gets bored with the subject after a couple classes

This gives him a bunch of random knowledge

When he talks to his younger siblings about classes, somehow he’s always managed to take at least one that they’re in, and offers advice.

He has the best RA stories. He most certainly did not need to be an RA. But the school was hurting for them and he thought it would be fun.

His residents loved him, but that didn’t stop them from playing beer pong in the common spaces at 3am.

He founds a circus arts club after his residents pull up information about his past and get overly excited about it

Specifically, he finds out they know about his past, because one of them decided it was a good idea to try and juggle knives, and because he’d prefer there not to be any additional bloodstains on the carpet he decides to start the club

He nearly graduated late because he forgot he needed to take specific classes for his major

Barbara: 

Computer Science/Math duel Major

She’s a TA for Comp Sci 1, all the students fight to get her help because she’s amazing at spotting bugs and is super patient

Somehow she’s the president of 3 clubs and is on student senate

She’s the curve breaker

She gets homework assignments meant to take a week done the day they’re assigned

She and Dick went to a single party together, stayed for five minutes, decided it was too loud, and went to get ice cream

Along with her club, she’s in professional organizations, and is part of a women in STEM mentoring program

She started a petition to get more wheel chair ramps installed. Half the buildings are protected under some “historical grounds” bs that’s an excuse for not being accommodating

The petition didn’t go anywhere at first, but it was widely shared on social media and made the school look horrible, so they implemented some of her proposals

Jason:

Philosophy/Cognitive Science duel Major

He gets asked “There’s a philosophy major?” every time he has to do one of those stupid what’s your name and major icebreakers

Jason lives in the library

He’s fallen asleep in there at 3am after it gets locked up

He quotes philosophers at his siblings when they’re being annoying, and it effectively shuts them up, because he only quotes the most nonsensical arguments

He gets involved with the college’s community outreach program

He volunteers for a local robotics team

When people find out his majors, they’re genuinely confused, because he understands robotics really well

He lies his ass off about being really interested in it as a child

Dick convinced him to be an RA for a semester, and he almost had a heart attack

Someone choked in front of him on the first day

Despite seeming like a tough RA, he genuinely cared about his residents and had to quit because he was so stressed out that one of them would do something stupid and die

Cass:

Innovation/Design Major

She’s really observant, so she’s great at spotting flaws in infrastructure and coming up with ways to fix them

Spending time with Barbara made her realize the lack of systems designed with wheelchair users in mind

Her experience being illiterate and not knowing English has imprinted on her the need for signage that can be understood by anyone

She focuses on taking project based classes, where she can draw out her designs and build them, rather than figuring out the math behind them

She has patents for the inventions she created at WE

She was exempted from the “Alfred’s mandatory college degree program” but decided to go as a part time student for herself

It took her twice as long to graduate, and a lot of tutoring from her siblings, but she made it!

The family threw her an extra special party when she graduated - everyone else had minor celebratory dinners, but they went all out for Cass

There was not a dry eye at her graduation ceremony

Cass works part time with WE on and off as a designer after her first internship

She comes up with ideas during patrols, draws them and sends them to Lucius

Tim:

Computer Science Major with a minor in game design

He makes it to approximately 20% of his lectures

He nearly didn’t graduate on time because he put off his humanity courses for so long

He missed the actual ceremony, even though the family showed up

He starts all his assignments the day before they’re due

If at all possible he avoids groupwork and offers to do assignments by himself because he gives his teammates heart attacks when he starts his part the project at 3pm the day before it’s due

This leads to extremely frequent all-nighters

He always finds himself rewriting everyone else’s code to make it work more efficiently

This can, of course, cause some people to feel a little upset

Other students specifically seek him out as a teammate so they can half ass their parts

He participates in game jams when he has time, and got super into the hacking club

Against all odds, he joined a fraternity

Dick literally fell off a building when he found out

He makes up stories about partying for the heck of it, when in reality he and the guys just play Smash Bros together until 3am

He hasn’t seen anyone drink more than two beers, and he hasn’t tried alcohol there either

He joined on accident, he had just pulled an all-nighter and stumbled into a recruiting fair, he heard someone shouting about Mario Kart Double Dash, and bada bing bada boom, he agreed to rush because it involved being stuck in a room playing video games all weekend

Steph:

Civil Engineering Major with minors in Sustainability and STSS (Science, Technology, and Social Science) 

She gets constantly shit on for being a civie

Every time she introduces herself someone mumbles “fake mechie” in the background

She and Jason complain about the disrespect together

She was genuinely shocked when Bruce offered to pay for her college tuition

She’d been planning on going and cutting costs any way possible

But Bruce took her aside when she was applying and offered to pay it all

She refused at first, but then money just appeared in her bank account, and what was she supposed to do, give it back?

She also participates in professional groups and is a member of SWE (Society of Women Engineers), and she mentors younger students

She ends up as class president by running a very successful social media meme campaign

She got and email saying she’d won and panicked because she had no idea what she was doing and was just having fun making memes

She ended up staying class president the entire time, and ended up getting really into it, and ended up with a pretty solid approval rating

She joined a sorority and had a blast

They worked with the local animal shelter, and she started bringing Damian along as well

Her sisters think he’s adorable and he secretly enjoys the attention

She gets her revenge on all the civil engineering haters by landing her dream job redesigning the poorer areas of Gotham to include more green spaces, increase affordable housing, and upgrading access to utilities

Duke:

Biochemisty Major with a minor in Neuroscience 

Harper, Tim, Steph, and him are all in the same year

Tim convinces him to join the fraternity with him

He joins a variety of professional groups as well

He mentors other BIPOC, and joins NSBE (National Society of Black Engineers) and runs helps run professional development programs

But he’s also in like million other clubs that he does not put on his resume

He’s runs the college’s meme page club, is part of the Pokémon Go club, is on the competitive Overwatch team, consistently attends the anime club’s Dragon Ball Z watch parties, joins the Dance Dance Revolution club, and the list goes on and on

When Tim is awake, and Harper isn’t busy, they go with him, but both of them have too much inconsistencies in their schedule to join

He ends up meeting like half the campus

He unintentionally has become a god of networking

Unlike his siblings, he goes all the way for a doctorate

He researches Joker venom, determined to figure out a cure for his parents (in my HC, he eventually does)

He wins like every award imaginable for his groundbreaking research into venoms as he comes up with vaccines that save countless lives

He still works on the meme page, even after he graduates

Harper:

She somehow defies all odds and triple majors in Physics, Mechanical Engineering, and Electrical Engineering

She takes credit overload every semester, and gets credit for her internships at WE

She and Steph were roommates freshman year, and Steph swears that Harper never sleeps

She is the most wanted partner for every engineering project

She thrives in college, and lives off of coffee

She’s in the front row in every lecture

She doesn’t leave the lecture halls, she’s gotten locked in more than once after falling asleep

She had a heart attack the first time she saw students using the machine shop

Half the students weren’t wearing safety glasses, she counted three people wearing slides, the machines were rusted over, the soldering irons were all broken, and she nearly watched someone break their wrist using a power drill

She refuses to work there

Her secret to success is prioritizing - she absorbs the material like a sponge so if homework is only worth 5%, it isn’t getting done, and she’ll just cram before the exam

She almost joined Tim and Duke’s frat (it’s co-ed), but she didn’t have the time

They let her in without rushing senior year because Tim ended up as the boss, and he said so

Cullen:

I don’t know a ton about Cullen, but I feel like he would be a comp sci major

He comes in when Harper, Tim, Duke, and Steph are upperclassmen, and he joins all of Duke’s clubs

They have a million inside jokes

To the other siblings, it seems like the two have their own language

He also joins a club that mentors LGTBQ+ students at the local high school, and encourages them to pursue STEM careers if they’re interested

Jason recruits him as a mentor for the robotics team (he’s the lead mentor at this point) after some of the kids in his mentoring program mention him at a meeting and Jason is like O.O

He avoids parties at all costs, and ends up joining the frat as well

It’s all Duke’s fault he’s in a frat

He does however, meet some lovely boys in the frat

Damian: 

Aerospace Engineering/Environmental Engineering dual Major with minors in sustainability and biology

He nearly riots when he’s presented with the college’s idea of a vegetarian/vegan meal

He manages to get out of the meal plan after that, and begins rallying students to push for better options that contain actual protein

He joins a community service club that works with the local animal shelter, and secretly joins the circus arts club (that’s thriving even without Dick there)

He learns how to sew blankets out of old clothes for the animals

He and Barbara are the only siblings to graduate with a 4.0, simply because they were the only one that took the time to actually do all the homework, and remembered to turn things in on time

He refuses to live in the dorms, and instead lives in one of their apartments nearby (once again somehow managing to complain to the college enough to get his housing waived)

He literally walked in once when visiting Duke, and immediately walked out, and resolved never to step near one again

He makes a total of three friends while at the school, both are in the animal shelter club

They exchange vegetarian/vegan recipes, and get together to cook

He decides to move off campus with them his junior year when they needed another roommate, and he won’t admit it to his siblings, but he had a ton of fun

He and his friend group may have joined an animal rights hacktivist group and may have helped orchestrate some major hacks

Poisson Ivy finds out and feeds him targets and information when they’re supposed to be fighting (she just walks back to Arkham if the others aren’t watching, and slips him a list at the end)

Bonus Bruce:

He cries at every graduation

He’s asked to make a speech at every graduation

He never does - it’s about his kids, not him

He single handedly is keeping the school from bankruptcy - not that any of his kids (other than probably Barbara) know

He sobbed for days after Cass graduated

He genuinely didn’t expect Dick or Tim to graduate

After Dick graduated, he wouldn’t let Bruce touch any of the equipment, and the rest of his kids followed suit

He isn’t actually bad at engineering, his education was just super informal, and hey duct tape works 95% of the time in his experience

The real reason Alfred was annoyed was because he refused to take the time to properly fix something if someone was in danger, and then he’d forget that he’d just used duct tape to patch something

But now since no one lets him touch anything, he’s genuinely lost a lot of the knowledge

But in a pinch, he can fix stuff

[prrplwtch]

Part 1

A/N: TW (updated) rape mention. 

P.S.: looks like I lied to nonnie, since I did not mention who Naamah’s father is , but he does appear in this chapter:) 

Our hearts’ desire. Part 2. Diavolo x f!MC

Barbatos, have you inquired about the Mirage Flowers?”

“Yes – they should be here in a few days, my lady,” he replied, even-toned, briefly looking up from the clipboard he’s holding in his hands, “As should the Crystal Roses.”

“Wonderful,” MC nodded, “We will have them planted right around the wedding tent.”

Diavolo had decided that the wedding of Naamah and Orias was to take place in the castle’s gardens. MC did not find the idea objectionable – the gardens were in full bloom, and with the addition of Mirage Flowers and Crystal Roses, everything was bound to look absolutely splendid. It was almost a pity that this ill-fated wedding was bound to be cut short.

Of course, she could not let anyone know.

As such, she dedicated herself fully to the wedding planning. Diavolo had assigned Barbatos to help her, and, though Barbatos went along with his lord’s orders, like he always did, it was clear that he was not at all thrilled about it.

The servants have finally finished putting up the wedding tent – it was gold and red and gleamed in the lights like an open fire.

“Marvelous,” she said, as she clasped her hands, “At times like this, it’s most important that the full splendor of the royal house if on display.”

MC could almost feel Barbatos roll his eyes behind her back.

“I’m afraid a display of finery may not be enough to resolve the current situation,” he offered quietly.

“It will not resolve it, but it’s a start,” MC insisted with a smile.

MC knew it was a lie, of course – the so-called “situation” will not be resolved until her daughter’s ascension to the throne, she’ll make sure of it.

“Have you made arrangements with the royal seamstress?” MC asked Barbatos after a momentary pause, “With the wedding so soon, it is imperative that she’ll start on Naamah’s dress immediately.”

“Of course,” Barbatos nodded, “She will be here tomorrow to attend to Naamah.”

“Delightful,” MC smiled, feeling a slight pang in her chest.

For her own safety, Naamah was not privy to the full details of MC’s plan.

“Just trust me, sweetling,” MC had told her after Diavolo announced that she was to wed Orias, “No harm will come to you, I’ll see to it.”

“Do I have to marry Orias?” Naamah asked her then, her dark eyes full of sadness.

“Remember the promise I made to you one day when you were very little?” MC said instead of answering Naamah’s question, “That you will be the queen one day, in your own right. This is me keeping my promise to you. But you have to trust me and do exactly as I say.”

“Very well,” Naamah answered after a momentary pause, “I trust you, mama. Even if that means I have to be Orias’s wife.”

My poor sweet girl – no one will ever lay their hands on you against your will.

“There is also the matter of the guest list,” Barbatos said, distracting MC from her thoughts, “Per your request, I have made the initial chart, and…”

Suddenly, he paused, and MC knew immediately what it was – Diavolo was summoning him to the castle.

“Perhaps, you can look over this while I go attend to lord Diavolo,” Barbatos said, handing the papers over to MC, “And we could continue as soon as I return.”

“We’ll continue tomorrow,” MC said, looking at Barbatos, “Who knew that wedding planning could be this exhausting.”

He looked her for a moment before saying, “As you wish.”

With that he left.

MC had settled on one of the garden benches with the guest list and the seating chart. She did not want to look at it, but she knew she had to. The wedding planning must go on as normal. She glanced at a clock and felt worry rise in her chest. It was already quite late in the afternoon, and Astaroth had not returned yet. Whatever could be keeping her…

There was a sudden, bright flash of light right next to her, forcing MC to close her eyes for a moment. As soon as she opened them, she saw Astaroth standing right in front of her.

“Ah, here you are,” MC smiled at her.

“Apologies for being late,” Astaroth offered with a smile, “There were some…unexpected issues I had to attend to.”

“But all is well?” MC asked, a tense feeling rising in her chest.

“Of course,” Astaroth replied lightly.

“I’m glad to hear it,” MC said, getting up from the bench, “Walk with me. I’d like to show you what we did to the gardens in preparation to the wedding.”

As they walked through the maze of flowers, MC quickly looked over her shoulder to ensure that that none of the servants followed them. Luckily, it appeared they have not. Satisfied, MC quietly whispered a spell she’d learned long ago from Solomon to ensure that no one could eavesdrop on her conversation with Astaroth.

“So, how do you like the gardens now?” MC asked, turning to Astaroth.

“It’s beautiful,” Astaroth replied, as she glanced around.

“Did he give you what I asked for?” MC said quietly as soon as they were far enough from the servants.

“Of course,” Astaroth nodded, producing a tiny wooden box from her pocket, “But Solomon told me to warn you to be extremely careful with it – one drop and…”

“I have read his notes,” MC replied hastily, “So I’m aware of the dangers. What of the…other thing I’d asked for?”

“It’s not ready yet,” Astaroth told her, frowning, “I’ll have to return to the human realm again in about a week for it. Luckily, that should not be a problem – he can just summon me.”

MC nodded – she understood that her second request was much more complicated than the first, so it made sense that Solomon would need time.

“How is he doing?” MC asked as they stopped for a moment by the lake.

“He is well - still as brilliant and as insufferable as the day he left the Devildom,” Astaroth let out a breathless laugh, “He misses you, I think – he asks me about you every time I see him.”

MC smiled – she was very grateful to have Solomon – and Astaroth – in her life. Solomon was her oldest, most reliable ally, their friendship going as far as to her first days in the Devildom. He’d offered to help her too, when he learned of her situation all those years ago, but MC refused. In part, out of pride – she did not want to be a person who needs to be rescued – and in part, because her heart desired justice and vengeance for the grave humiliation that Diavolo had dealt her. Diavolo will pay one day – she’ll take everything from him and tread his legacy to dust.

Her friendship with Astaroth was far more surprising – MC never thought that she’d find such support in a member of Diavolo’s court, but, due to her history, Astaroth had a genuine sympathy in her heart for women who found themselves in position such as MC’s. Though their friendship took a while to blossom, these days MC trusted Astaroth with her life.

“Any news of Belial and his supporters?” MC asked, after a brief pause.

“Why yes,” Astaroth nodded with a smirk, “I made sure that the whispers have reached his ears, just like you wanted. He’s planning his move - and soon.”

“Good, just make sure it’s not too soon,” MC said, then added, “And when will Diavolo learn of this new and troubling developments?”

“I thought today might be a good day,” Astaroth replied, a hint of amusement apparent in her eyes.

“I agree,” MC said after a pause, feeling warmth rise in her chest – there were few things she liked more than cause Diavolo anguish.

“Excellent,” Astaroth smiled, then glanced at her phone screen, “Is there anything else you need my help with at the moment? If no, I have an appointment to keep, that I’d rather not be late to.”

“Nothing I can think of,” MC replied.

“Very well. Do let me know if something comes up,” Astaroth said.

Before she could disappear, MC reached out and took Astaroth by hand.

“Thank you,” she said, gently squeezing her palm, “For everything you are doing for me.”

“Of course,” Astaroth replied with a light smile, “You can always count on me.”

With that, she disappeared in a flash of light, leaving MC by herself in the garden. MC looked down at the small wooden box she was holding in her hand – she needed to hide it immediately. Though she wanted nothing more than to run to her room, MC knew that that would look suspicious, so instead, she made her way back to the castle at a leisurely pace.

As soon as she was back in her room, MC hurried to the window. There, on the left side of the windowsill was a loose stone that she could easily remove. MC quickly put the box in the empty space, then placed the stone back as she whispered a spell intended to conceal her hiding place from the eyes of others.

Once she was done, MC sat by her desk, resting for a moment. She knew that all she could do now was wait – and yet the fact that she was closer to her goal than she had been in centuries was making her restless. I need to be patient, if I want to succeed, MC scolded herself.

To occupy herself, she decided to head to the kitchens to ask the cook to prepare Naamah’s favorite dessert. MC felt guilty for involving her own daughter into her plan, but she knew that without Naamah it could not succeed. Please forgive me, sweetling.

As she made her way down to the kitchens, suddenly, she’d heard familiar voices. Carefully, MC approached the doors and looked in. Immediately there was a pang of sadness in her chest – she saw Beelzebub and Mammon there, with Evelyn – the new exchange student from the human world.

Diavolo was quite entertained by the exchange program and brought in human students every few years. Fortunately for them, he did not try to keep any of them in the Devildom the way he kept MC. Still, the sight of her former friends having fun baking something brought memories to MC’s mind that made her heart clench. Oh, what she would give up to return to that simple, innocent time.

It’s far too late, MC shook her head, I cannot waver now.

“What are they doing here?” she asked a servant that was passing by.

“Barbatos invited Evelyn for a baking lesson, since she loves to bake,” the servant told MC, “And she brought Mammon and Beelzebub with her.”

I see.

“Did you need something from the kitchens, my lady?” the servant asked.

It took a while for the demons in the castle to address her “my lady”, but, seeing how much Diavolo favored her over his wife, they’ve soon picked up the habit.

“Yes,” MC said, “Go tell the cook to prepare Naamah’s favorite dessert than have in brought to her rooms.”

“As you say,” the servant replied before leaving.

MC lingered in the corridor for a moment longer, listening to the happy chatter between her former friends, feeling deep, heavy longing settle in her chest. She shook her head, trying to chase away the unwelcome thoughts. No, that part of her life was over.

It seemed that fate enjoyed toying with her that day because, as MC was walking through the castle gallery on the way to her rooms, she ran into Lucifer. He looked exhausted and pale – more so than usual – and could hardly meet her eyes as he greeted her. But then again, it’s been ages since he’d looked her in the face. She passed by him quickly without so much as looking back at him – there was no use in lingering.

MC is hardly surprised when later in the evening there is an insistent knock on her door, and Diavolo comes in. He is stressed and distraught, she can tell by the fact that he is in his demon form. MC is pleased, though nothing in her face betrays that – of course he is, after the news he’d received today.

Diavolo only ever comes to her room for counsel or companionship in bed, and by the look on his face, MC knows that it is not her counsel he is seeking that evening. She does not want to lay with him – she never did, not from the day he’d told to that she was to be his mistress – but he’ll never know that. Her smile is practiced and perfect and inviting – and he is none the wiser.

When Diavolo leans in to kiss her, MC responds with trained eagerness, as her fingers snake through his hair. When he pushes her to bed, MC lets out a small gasp then laughs as she beckons him with her index finger. When his hands scrape obscenely on her bare skin as he shreds her nightgown and tangles her long hair in his fist, she simply smiles and moans, just the way she knows he likes.

MC has no illusions that the woman she was when she came into the Devildom would be repulsed by this – but she is not her, not anymore. And so, she writhes and gasps and moans as he pushes inside her – just the way he expects from her. As she finds her mind drifting, bored, MC forces herself to focus. She cannot have him doubt her feelings, not now.

It takes entirely too long before he rolls off of her, and there is nothing MC wants more than to be left alone. But her performance is not over – not yet – and so she moves closer to Diavolo and rests her head on his chest.

“Is everything alright, my love?” she asks, concern in her voice as genuine as she could muster, “You seem quite somber today.”

“It’s…everything,” Diavolo sighs, “I’ve come upon some quite disturbing news today, but also my wife is not making things any easier with the wedding…”

Ah.

“I take it she still haven’t warmed up to the idea,” MC says, looking Diavolo in the face.

“No,” he sighs, “She did not. I tried reasoning with her, tried telling her that this wedding is essential to secure our son’s position on the throne, and yet she would not hear it…I tell you, this woman loves me not.”

And whose fault is that? MC thinks.

She knows the queen, too, had no say when it came to her marriage to Diavolo. And he did hardly anything to secure her affections.

“I’m sure she just has a difficult time accepting that her son is growing,” MC says softly, “I do too – it is as though just yesterday Naamah was a child, and now she’s a woman grown, soon to be married.”

“You are too kind to my wife,” Diavolo sighs, as he takes her hand into his and brings it to his lips, “That’s what I love about you – your beautiful heart that lets you always see the best in people.”

MC smiles – if only he knew – but her face betrays nothing.  

“Is there anything I can do to help? About the troubling news you heard…or about the queen?”

“I’ll have your counsel on the morrow,” Diavolo presses soft kisses to her fingers, “But for now you should rest.”

With that he climbs out of her bed and begins getting dressed.

“Will you not stay with me, my love?” MC asks. She wants nothing more than to be left alone right now, but she knows she needs to ask.

“I’d love nothing more,” Diavolo says with a chagrinned smile, “But there are certain matters I need to attend to.”

“You should be kinder to yourself,” MC says softly.

“What would I do without you,” Diavolo replies, as he leans in and kisses her.  

When he finally leaves, MC falls back onto her pillows and smiles – it’s not too long now. Soon he will pay for all her suffering.

[merrybrides]

15 Key Secrets To A Successful Marriage

Wouldn’t you like to know the secret sauce to a happy and long-lasting marriage, especially from those happily married couples who have aced the art of leading a happy relationship?

We unveil 15 secrets of a successful marriage that will help you problem-solve the marital issues, disarm the conflicting spouse and help you create and maintain a successful marriage.

1. Be independent

Independence was rated ‘extremely important’ in a marriage.

In order to be happy in a relationship, we must be happy first. That is, in fact, the key to a successful relationship. With that in mind, wives and husbands must continue to take out time for themselves, enjoy their personal hobbies, and in general, spend some time apart.

Not only does absence make the heart grow fonder, but in the time we spend alone, we get to reunite with our spiritual side, re-establish our sense of self, and check in with the progress of our personal preferences, goals, and achievements.

Being dependent, on the other hand, weakens your resolve and ability to move forward as a free thinker.

When we maintain our independent sense of self, we will always have something to talk about at the dinner table, and we are forever stronger, healthier, and more attractive to our partners.

2. Be a good listener

We need to talk.

Most partners dread this sentence but do you know that if you are wondering how to have a successful relationship then creating a platform for healthy conversations is the way to go?

While all women should work in the art of active listening, we emphasize this as an area of special attention for men. Too often, men do not realize that all their partner needs from them is a listening ear.

This is due to their programming and the way in which they are taught to relate to others.

Remember that listening and hearing are not the same things. Listening involves our hearts. Open yours, hear what she says, look at her while she speaks, paraphrase even, and reassure.

Listening is the real key to a happy marriage, for that matter, to every relationship.

3. Agree to disagree

Being good together does not mean that couples agree on every little thing. Most of the couples we interviewed actually had varying attitudes, opinions, and belief systems; and even held opposing views on major areas in some cases.

All couples should have some level of disagreement somewhere. Successful, loving couples respected the point of view of one another and even had a sense of humor over their points of contention.

Remember, respect is one of the major elements of a successful marriage.

Recognize that of two opposite views, one of them does not have to be right.

4. Communicate – know your partner’s ‘Love Language’

There are several books out there on the Languages of Love. This was developed of the concept in psychology that each individual has his or her own unique way in which they communicate love.

By knowing your partner’s preferences and hobbies, metaphors can be used in communication that relates to something the person understands well.

Observe the physical way in which your partner shows love and you’ll know what makes a successful marriage.

This could be, washing your car, or picking up the kids. From her, it could be keeping the toiletries stocked and ironing his shirts. For others, its words, letters, and affection.

Our advice for a successful marriage? Figure out your partner’s love language so you will always know how to speak to him or her. Love languages are often talked about but couples don’t pay as much attention to this than they should.

Understanding a spouse’s love language is the secret to a happy relationship.

5. Acceptance

A major relationship killer, lack of acceptance is a trait more commonly attributed to women, who are known for their nagging. Remember, we married our spouse for who he was then, and who he is now. Even if we wanted to change him now, we can’t.

The key to a successful marriage lies in realizing this as soon as possible.

When urging or persuading him, you are only focusing on his weaknesses or problems. Change your perspective immediately and start focusing on positive traits instead.

6. Take responsibility

It is that easy and one of the secrets of a successful marriage. When you participate in a project, take responsibility for your successes and your failures.

When you and your partner have a disagreement or argument, remember to take responsibility for your actions, including anything you did or said, especially if it was hurtful, unthoughtful or created adversity.

7. Never take one another for granted

Taking one another for granted may be the most toxic pathogen of all. Once they are comfortable, it is easy for couples to begin to slip into a complacent state – and expectations form.

This is actually only a matter of human nature, as we get comfortable with what is familiar, but in marriage, you absolutely should never come to a place where you take your partner for granted.

Pledge to respect your partner indefinitely no matter what. Avoid assumptions, and offer to do nice things for your partner whenever possible. Most successful marriages have partners who vouch for this.

8. Date night

Among the other tips for a successful marriage, this tip is the most ignored and overlooked by couples, especially those who have been married for a while. It does not matter what a couple does on their date night.

Simply having a night when they spend their time just with each other strengthens the bond and maintains it over time. When you have a date night, you should turn your phones off and put them away so you are free of distractions.

Watch a movie at home with popcorn or go hiking or rollerblading together. Change it up often and be helpful and positive for one another. A romantic and thoughtful date night is not just one of the steps to a successful marriage but indeed one of the main ingredients of a successful marriage as well.

It is important to schedule this monthly if not weekly in order to maintain accountability and establish a pattern of importance in regard to date night.

9. Add romance

Wondering how to make marriage successful? Go old school with your romance. Romantic acts can be many – try giving her a flower someday or place a love note in his briefcase or backpack. Surprise him with his favorite meal, or watch the sunset together.

There is no shortage of ideas, and you’ll be amazed at how far a little romance goes toward strengthening the relationship.

10. Keep intimacy alive

Sex is very important to a healthy marriage. Sex should be regular, and therapists suggest doing it even when you’re not in the mood!

We suggest keeping it interesting by talking about what pleases you and adding any fantasy role-playing, positions, or bedroom props you may want to introduce to keep it exciting.

After all, what is a successful marriage if it doesn’t let you get what you desire?

Life coach Giovanni Maccarrone talks about how making this one conscious decision before getting married can be helpful in making a marriage successful.

11. Compliments

“A compliment a day keeps the divorce attorney away.” Acknowledging your partner’s positive attributes every day, and paying compliments, will go a long way in your relationships.

Stay positive, and keep track of what your spouse does well. When the going gets rough and his not-so-great attributes come forward, rather than focusing on the negative, try switching gears, and point out the positive stuff instead.

12. Look for the soft emotion

Behind every “hard” emotion is a soft one; this is a concept taught by psychologists.

When we feel anger, it’s usually masking another emotion behind it, such as sadness, disappointment, or jealousy. We often just use anger as a disguise to protect our vulnerabilities.

Looking for the “soft” or vulnerable emotions underneath someone’s hard display of anger will help keep you connected as you are better equipped to empathize with that person’s true emotion.

We are often searching for tips for a successful relationship but fail to realize that a simple thing such as identifying the reality of emotions can keep us on the right track.

13. Let go of the fantasy

Unfortunately, we are socialized to believe in fairytale endings and we may carry some false perspectives on reality with us into adulthood. We need to recognize that, while marriage can be a beautiful thing, it is not effortless, nor will it ever be perfect.

Have realistic expectations and do not fall victim to the fairy tale – you may find yourself sorely disappointed. This is not only one of the greatest factors of a successful marriage but plays a huge role in your happiness as an individual too.

14. Do not control

Married people often come to a place where they start to lose themselves, they give in to jealousy or feelings of inadequacy, or they forget that they are separate people away from their partners, and they may try to control their partners.

Most of the time this is done inadvertently, as expectations may grow over time.

What makes a marriage successful are communication, independent time, and healthy indulgences that will keep any couple on track. If you sense you are being controlled or are the controller, get a handle on it or make an appointment for a family counselor.

15. Never use the D- word

Presuming you don’t really want to get a divorce, don’t threaten to. Couples that use the D-word or talk about separation during fights use this as a control mechanism. Couples using it in a threatening way are more likely to see Divorce come to fruition.

Making threats is not a mature strategy for solving any problem, so don’t do it.

Most happy couples swear by these successful marriage tips. Follow these tips on how to have a successful marriage; you will not only be able to save your marriage but also be able to enjoy a highly successful one.

[jckelly]

how easy it is to pretend / para

goes with this playlist

& this one (for jack’s relationship w his brother

Piece things back up for me, it’s hysterical to think that it’s almost a year to the day.

Maybe the lyrics aren’t meant in the way Jack is hearing them at all. They could be a love song, an ode to a long-lasting relationship. Or a friendship, because does everything really have to be about sex? Or perhaps he’s not hearing them right anyway, it’s often the case when his mind is elsewhere, the words blur into something else entirely. Maybe they’re just about drugs and shit. Fuck knows he’s never been good at analysis. But right now, the words he thinks he heard are hitting a little too close to home. 

Home, which is six thousand miles away, and yet today he can’t quite feel the distance because there’s a bungee chord screwed right into his heart, yanking his feelings until they crash right back into a rainy morning in a church, the last time Jack set foot in a place of worship, probably the only time. He’s never been one for spirituality. Even that morning, the one he tries so hard to keep from reentering his mind, the presence of God is noticeably absent. The only comfort he recalls is the feeling of his brother’s hand in his, a gesture of solidarity in the face of death. I’m here. 

Finn’s not here now, though, and maybe it’s harsh of Jack to see his silent statement back at the funeral as an abject lie now that he sits alone, devoid of the presence of his brother, but it’s not like he can quite help his emotions, or the thoughts that split in his head into fragments, pieces of each other. If a vase breaks, which shard is the original piece? Which thought came first, the thought that Finn had been there for him or the thought that Finn is a liar? (It’s not usually in Jack’s nature to be so philosophical. Maybe he should be cursing the fifth can of cider his palm curves around instead of his brother, who’s nine hours behind and therefore probably unaware even of the anniversary. His brother is rarely to blame, as much as he blames him all the same. In most cases it’s Jack’s fault. Most things are.)

Inhale, exhale, smoke travels through his lungs, swells his airways, the beginnings of a tar clogged artery, perhaps a touch of lung cancer. Self destruction is often so aesthetic. He thinks back to the girls back home, in a line outside the club puffing on ciggies, like a line to the slaughterhouse waiting to be picked up by a guy like Jack, a guy as destructive as the nicotine they’re inhaling. He’d been happy to play along back then, take his pick for the night and take her home, bodies push together into socially expected sex, more out of habit than desire. He didn’t have much desire for anyone back home. He’d never really desired a connection. 

Back then, it had been a mark of pride amongst the boys he knew to fuck girls and never call back. Walk them back to the bus stop in the morning, like an empty gesture of nonexistent chivalry, mouths sour with the aftertaste of the night before’s vodka. He’d mastered the system at sixteen, understood the unspoken rules of fucking and leaving and hurting. Attachments had never been his forte at any rate, the questionable morals of secondary school played only to his strengths. He only fucks up once the fucking ends and the feelings begin, once the words he says begin to be taken seriously and suddenly he has to think about them, question the contents of his mouth before it spews out into a mushroom cloud, an atomic bomb of emotional destruction. As much as he pretends otherwise, Jack doesn’t always intent it that way. The hurt is more accidental than he lets on. 

The rooftop is cold, and the skyline is unfamiliar. They’ve been in Japan for barely a month at most, he still gets lost every other time he ventures off campus. He’d just gotten past the feeling of unfamiliarity in America when they announced the travel program, and now he gets to be a stranger in a city every month, once again covering the anxious feeling in his stomach with shards of dry wit. Jack’s never been a big fan of change. He’s had too much of that.

Teenagers in Sheffield change quicker, he’s noticed. Or maybe it’s true that when your privilege is lessened, you’re given less time to be a child. They can’t afford to fuck around for their whole lives, or maybe they simply mature quicker in the context of living in a city which never quite seems to wake up on the surface, eternal slumber leading to them finding different occupations for their beds. He’s reminded every time he goes home of his relative immaturity. How dare he exist without responsibility at 19? What has he done to deserve to be different? It’s something Jack has yet to figure out. Possibly, he never will. He’s not sure he actually does deserve to be different. He’s not shown it through his actions yet. 

And yet it seems to him as if Finn has always risen above whatever the others had been doing. Known before they had come to the realisation years later that their methods of amusement would never pay off in the real world, known to prepare for things other than just fucking with other people. Maturity. It’s a trait Jack has never managed to acquire, no matter the fact that he’s nineteen now, an adult. A man, people like to remind him on occasion, people like Claire and George and whatever other adult influence he’s managed to come across, despite his best efforts. No, while Finn seems to be aware of social rules and all the things Jack can’t quite crack, Jack stays internally delayed. Maybe it’s a genetic thing. The influence of his mother never moving on, staying in the same place from the moment he was born to the moment he lost her. Passed out on the couch, needle marks staining her arms. A state of arrested development she never quite overcame. Maybe Jack will never overcome either. 

It’s hysterical to think that it’s almost a year to the day. The lyrics are churning around his brain, still. It is hysterical. Although he’s not quite sure what’s more hysterical, the fact that he lost her or the fact that it still comes as a surprise to this day when he catches himself reminiscing and is struck again and again, nearly a year later, by the realisation that she’s gone. Shouldn’t he have expected this? Known that she would leave? (Everyone in Jack’s life leaves eventually. It’s a truth, rather than a comment founded in melodrama. Perhaps it’s for the best that his mother doing what everyone before her had chosen to do was not out of her own decision. And then the fact that he’s just felt it was a good thing that his own mother died makes him feel sick to his stomach, the cider tipping back and forth through his intestines. Suddenly, he’s not a nice level of drunk anymore. He’s just sad and tipsy and tired. Tired more than anything else.)

As much as he doesn’t want to admit it, there’s a trap door in Jackson Kelly Fielding’s mind. Whenever it opens - and it’s rarely because he opened it, more often because it forces its way up - he falls back into a pit of memory, hitting each stair of trauma on the way down until he’s lying at the bottom and the world around him is barely a tiny dot of light a hundred and fifty feet above. Then the stupid fucking cinema opens and the curtains draw back, and he’s stuck for hours, reliving every minute, every opportunity he had to save her. Was there a moment? A minute when if he had said one less word, or one more, it would have changed things? Was there a turning point that Jack was too oblivious to see? (He hasn’t found it yet. But he remains certain that he will.)

Tokyo, Japan is eight hours ahead of Sheffield, United Kingdom. Jack’s googled it. It’s one in the morning here, on April 1. In Sheffield, it will be April 1 in seven hours. In seven hours it will be the one year anniversary of his mother shooting up in her flat, alone. Of a sad, solitary death. And it feels so unfair to Jack that in seven hours, as with the year before, the rest of the world will continue living their lives without a thought to someone who lies cold in the ground. It feels so fucking unfair that the sun will rise and rain will fall in some countries and snow in others and people will be laughing and getting engaged and having children, that people will be playing practical fucking jokes on each other and that the event which has torn Jack in two will have had no impact on anyone. It feels damn unfair to Jack that everyone else is allowed a life. That some people are even allowed a mother. He’s allowed neither. His life revolves around his mother, and his mother doesn’t exist. 

(And the thought of his mother lying alone in her flat waiting to be found really feels like a punch to the gut. Was she cold? Did it hurt? He could spend endless hours googling if heroin overdoses are painful. If there was any chance she could feel as she slowly ceased to breathe. How long it would have taken before the arms which held him went cold and stiff. And the worst thought of all, the thought of her screaming and screaming inside her coffin underneath the piles upon piles of dirt and Jack being too far away to hear as she suffocated and swallowed the worms. He’s had nightmares of her coming back, her lips curled into an eternal scream as a beetle crawls out and drips onto his bed.) (Maybe this is why they never let Jack see the body. He’s always had an overactive imagination.)

Jack knows Finn doesn’t struggle in this way. Or at least, he assumes so from the brief conversations he has with his brother, held across oceans over the phone or on video call, the blurry impression he gets of his face. Then again, Finn’s maturity just makes it clearer to Jack that there is little of their mother in him. Jack admires the ability to be someone different, in part because it’s something he lacks. He himself is barely more than the sum of his parts: an absent father and a mother who perhaps should have been absent. He often thinks that if their places were swapped and it was Jack laying cold in the ground, the impact on the world would be similar. Or more likely even less. Maybe it would be a day of celebration, since all he ever creates is damage. Damage on those around him, damage to those who dare to show him the slightest bit of affection. Damage to Balo, who has never deserved anything but love. Yes, he thinks the world would be better off without Hurricane Jack. He is an explosion of a person, and the only lasting impact he can hope to leave is the debris of those unfortunate enough to know him. 

Inhale, exhale. The smoke is clearer now that the sky is becoming lighter, and he wonders how long he’s been on the roof. Or if it even matters anymore. It’s not like waking up early for lectures and going to class and doing his exams will make much of a difference, because he is still Jack and he’s long since lost hope that he can reinvent himself beyond a name change. He casts his mind back to the teenagers in Sheffield that had held his attention before - and he almost laughs at the idea that he had thought about them with such disdain. How could he? Their bad decisions seem to just create a life which goes a different way, and in Jack’s head nothing they do with that life could ever be as bad as what he has done to the people around him. And what he has done to his own mother. Psychic matricide. Or maybe he just sucked all of her traits from her until there was nothing left to sustain life. It would explain why he has taken on her entire personality. Naturally, he’s too empty to come up with his own, with his own taste in music, with his own appearance, with anything. Originality would require some sort of positive trait. 

The sun is starting to rise above the unfamiliar skyline. Another day, and yet it can’t just be another day because it’s still some sick anniversary. One year of his mother being gone. One year of sunrises she hasn’t seen, one year of days she has not checked off of her calendar. One year of mornings in which she hasn’t been able to wake up. For once, when he looks across the view, Jack doesn’t feel the pang of homesickness which usually hits him. Why would he? There is nothing to go back to in Sheffield but memories he’d rather suppress and people he’d mess up even further. 

He realises with a jolt that he’s had the same song on loop, without even realising. The last lyrics float into the air: nearly every other word that comes from your mouth keeps me hanging on.

Apt. Even in death, every word that his mother ever said to him rings in his ears as if she’s just saying it now. And every single one is accompanied by a fresh stab of guilt. He’s not familiar with the song, but he makes a mental note to remove it from his playlist regardless. It’s hitting far too close to home. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #342

“in this farewell, there’s no blood, there’s no alibi  /  ‘cuz i’ve drawn regret from the truth of a thousand lies”

What’s your all-time favourite cartoon? Does anime count? In which case I'd say Fullmetal Alchemist, or the original Pokemon. If we're not including anime, then uhhhh Avatar: The Last Airbender, even though I have much more to go in the series. Have you ever taken dance lessons? What kind? Yeah, I've done a few for many years: jazz, clogging, modern, and hip hop. When did you last run and why? I literally couldn't tell you. I don't even know if I can run with the current state of my legs. My knees would probably crumple. Does your house/flat/whatever the hell you live in need cleaning? Not necessarily cleaning, but sorting. I still have boxes outside and inside my room of my stuff I need to put up somewhere... but whenever I prepare to do it, I just get so overwhelmed and shy away from it. Then there's the spare room, that's a total mess loaded with boxes and the like. Mom and I have just avoided it like the plague. Was your last relationship with a man or a woman? Woman. What do you think your next achievement will be? HOPEFULLY getting a job... Do you like mushrooms? NOOOOOOO. What dream do you remember most vividly? I'm not talking about it. Favorite kind of bread? Pumpernickel. Rabbits or hamsters? Rabbits. I've never met a nice hamster, and I just think rabbits are cuter. A movie you’ve never seen that it seems like every one else has? Harry Potter films. Favorite dog breed? I'm biased towards beagles. When was the last time you climbed a tree? Never, actually. Where I live, there aren't really many weighty trees with low branches. Just pine trees. Most common lie you tell? That I'm "fine" when I'm not. Ever seen your parents make out? Jc no, I'll take a hard pass there. Do you put your hair up a lot or down? It's too short to put up. Most of the time do you straighten or curl your hair? Neither. What piercing do you hate? I'm not a fan of cheek dermals at all, but you do you 100%. Were you raised in a religious house? Yes; I was raised Roman Catholic. Do your parents get mad when you're on the computer for hours? Mom used to for many years until I became an adult and she just realized it was in vain. I haven't lived with Dad since I was a teenager, but when my parents were together, he usually didn't say anything. Have you ever been asked for a nude picture? No, thankfully. I'd stop talking to the person immediately. What would you do if your parent hit you? I honestly feel like I'd slap them back and get the fuck out. Or just freeze in shock and cry. What's your most common mood? Stressed but distracted. Do you like poems? Yeah, usually. Ever kissed someone half-naked? Uh yeah. Have you ever been in a parade? No. Do you still play Pokémon? I play Pokemon GO, and I've actually been tempted to get out my DS and play one of the games I have (I can't remember which). I do find Pokemon games to be VERY grind-ey, though, so I can't play them for too long without getting bored. What is your favorite Pokémon? Ninetales. I also really love Espeon, though, and Charmander will always have my heart. Is there an animal you like that most people don't? Bats! :') Is there an animal that you think is overrated in terms of how it's liked? No animal is overrated. Have you ever "quit" a site and came back to it more than once? Uhhhh I don't think so. Do you have an "odd" fascination with anything? Most would probably consider "vulture culture" to be pretty weird, being drawn to dead animals and all... What's the hardest thing you've been through, & what did you learn from it? The breakup with Jason. I learned that some people make promises they aren't afraid to break, that someone can promise "forever" and not mean it, that the most unexpected can just snap their fingers and forget about you... I learned a lot. And most things, not positive. What are three "unrealistic" things you want most? 1.) To be able to financially support myself by just freelance nature photography; 2.) sooo many different kinds of pets; and 3.) to be totally rid of my mental illnesses. Do you take any daily vitamins? No, but I would if I was the one who bought groceries and stuff. I do however take Vitamin D once a week for my legs. Who are three of your favorite fictional characters of all time? JUST THREE??????? FUCK MAN idk. Uhhh well there's of course Darkiplier and Wilford Warfstache, then uhhh probably Pyramid Head. If you had to give the world a pre-existing mythological/fictional being, what would it be? Idk, I'd really need to be more educated on their lore before I made that decision. Do you have any desire to learn (a) foreign language(s)? Which? I both do and don't want to resume learning German. I got very good at it and could have basic conversations, but lack of application has slaughtered my vocabulary. Now it's like, it'd be nice to try again, but for what purpose? I don't think I'll ever actually apply it to my life, so it just seems like it'd be a load of wasted effort. But then on the other hand, I also feel that doing something you simply want to do isn't a waste of time. Idk. What is one of your firmest beliefs? Equality for all. No race, religion, whatthefuckever makes you more or less valuable than someone else. Do you have anything that keeps you from doing something you'd truly enjoy? Oh yes. Depression and anxiety, mostly. Do you work to fix your faults? Or at least, admit to them? I definitely try, and I'll certainly admit to them. How do you hope the world will change, if at all? I just want more compassion, less violence, more understanding... What is/are your view(s) on god, religion, spirituality, or relations to? In short, I believe that something sentient created the universe, and it/they/he/she/what-have-you just... let life play out from there, I think. I like to believe there's a plane of consciousness like an afterlife that exists, but if not, I don't really care. I hope the evil get what was coming to them, and the good get back what they gave, but maybe we're all better off without life after death. We'll all find out one day. Are you arachnophobic or scared of spiders in the least? Some, yes; others, not so much. This is very situational. Do you play WoW? What do you think of it either way? Haha, you're asking an avid player. I enjoy it, but not as much as I used to. At one point I was a Heroic raider, sometimes dabbling in Mythic, but now I'm just mostly a casual mount collector that likes chatting with my guildies and just doing dailies 'n shit. I owe a lot to the game, honestly; it helped me stay occupied throughout the breakup, and still today gives me something to do. What kind of computer do you have? Windows 7/Vista/XP/Other? I have an Acer Nitro with Windows 10. Are you taking any interesting classes in school/do you not attend? I'm no longer in school. If you don't attend, are you taking any "lessons" for anything? No, but I would like to join a photography course somewhere. A book/piece that has had an exceptional impact on your life? Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo just made me hate war more than I innately did. What genres of music are your favorite? Just metal as an umbrella term. Some heavy stuff, some less, some in the middle, some leaning towards other genres... but I just like metal. Do you think that fate plays a part in people's lives? No. Wouldn't "fate" just make it all... worthless? Like we're just storybook characters with a predetermined ending? What are your opinions on the media? One word: manipulative. What's a piece of technology you'd like to own? I REALLY want a PS4, especially lately. There's just a lot of games I REALLY want to play. Are you afraid of technology developing to where we're too reliant on it? We're already *too* reliant on it, which I do believe is a bad thing. I know, absolutely hysterical for me to be talking. What's your favorite odd ice cream flavor? I don't think I've ever had a truly odd ice cream flavor. There's this local place though that makes a kind that tastes JUST like s'mores, and I can fucking murder a cup of that. What's your opinion on stereotypes/labels? They're limiting and devalue uniqueness, imo. I know very, very few people who totally fit a certain stereotype, so why even bother. Like I don't care if you use them as adjectives to some extent, just don't put too much weight on them. Just be you. Do you believe that history repeats itself? It's not necessarily doomed to, but it happens sometimes, obviously. Would you rather learn from your mistakes or just undo them? Depends on the mistake. What was the most interesting class you had in school? Probably Mythology in high school. Do you write? If so, what? Yeah, meerkat role-play. And every now and again, poetry. Do you have a favorite culture? No; I'm not educated on nearly enough to pick one. Do you believe in global warming? Have you researched it? Lol no shit I do. I don't exactly think it takes much research to see with your own two eyes that it's factual. Do you prefer piercings or tattoos? Tattoos, if I had to pick. What comedy movie is your favorite? White Chicks. Have you ever meditated? Yes. Doesn't work for me. What comes to mind when you think of a great moment in your life? Realizing it was my choice to liberate myself and my happiness from my ex. He didn't and never should've carried it, because that's my right. What do you like about springtime? Aaaaall the flowers. <3 How have you handled having to stay in? It's not really different from my average day, so... How would your friends describe you? Quiet and overthinks literally everything. Have you ever hallucinated? When I was coming off a certain med in middle school, I saw black moving shadows. What (or who) is the best thing that ever happened to you? The partial hospitalization program I attended for two months following my suicide attempt. It's where I met my psychiatrist, who set my medication straight. Medicine besides though, I learned so many coping techniques and just how to deconstruct my trauma. As well as possible, anyway. What is the worst decision you ever made? Handing over the ability to make happiness for myself to another person. What is your favorite arcade game? Don't have one. Do you feel neglected? No. What school subject(s) are/were your best? English, Arts, Science. Are you allergic to pollen? Yep. What style of wedding dress do you like best? Probably ballgown. Are you over your first love? I probably never will be in complete totality. Do you always answer your phone? No. I only ever do if I recognize the number. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? Today is actually my sister's birthday. What song is currently stuck in your head? I have Halocene's cover of "What I've Done" on a loop right now. It has me absolutely covered in goosebumps. Do you ever use coloring books? Not really anymore. Do you personally know anyone who is an author? Not to my knowledge, no. What’s your favorite kind of salsa/dip to go with tortilla chips? Just your normal, mildly hot salsa. Do you wash your car by hand or drive through a car wash? Mom's car hasn't been washed in... well, years, given its bumper. Mom worries that in a car wash, it'll be broken off (it is literally held on with a lot of zip ties and duct tape), and we ourselves don't want to wash it, so... Do you have any uncommon kitchen appliances, such as espresso machines, waffle irons, etc? I know we have one or two, but idk what they're called. What did your parents major/minor in in college, if they went? Dad never went to college. Mom changed her major a few times, but her latest was social work, I believe. Has either of their careers influenced what career you chose or want to pursue? Not at all. What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Hurricanes. Why is your least favorite season your least favorite? Because it's hot as fuck and humid. Have you ever had an animal get into your attic? No. When was the last time you started a “new chapter” of your life? I don't know. Hopefully I'll start one soon when I leave PHP and pursue a job... What room in your home do you spend the least amount of time in? I'm always in my room. Do you do anything to reduce the amount of electricity you use? I feel awful admitting I do quite the opposite... Being in the dark during the day affects my depression, so I'll have my lamp (or both) on even if it's just sort of shaded inside. Are you usually open to trying a new food that you aren’t familiar with? Eh, it depends on the food. I'm not very adventurous with foods though. Do you listen to Panic! At The Disco? I do. Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? ... It wasn't "kinky," but it was a dream lmao. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you couldn’t say it back? That's how I ended the whole Joel childishness. Which friend do you confide in most? My mom. Do you wear a cross? No. What is your favorite doughnut? That's so hard. :( Krispy Kreme's normal glazed though probably takes the cake. I also love chocolate frosted and just totally plain, though. Do you have a hot tub? If so, where is it located? No. Did you read the Twilight series, or jump on the bandwagon after the movie? Neither. Do you or your parents rake your yard? Dad did growing up. Now nobody does or needs to. Who did you last go to the movies with? Dad, I think? What color was the last vehicle you were in? White. Do you have any family members in the military right now? No. Is there a ceiling fan in the room you’re in? Yeah. Have you ever heard voices? No. If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? Sara. Do you remember the first time your first crush ever said hi to you? No. Do you ever go places with wet hair? Yeah, idc. Who is your favorite little girl? My nieces. What do you want the most in life? To feel like I made a difference, even a tiny one. If you could have anyone’s singing voice, whose would you choose? OBVIOUSLY Amy Lee's. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought that turned out to be a waste of money? *shrug* What’s something you’ve bought that turned out to be way more useful than you anticipated? Hm. Have you ever been on a ship? No. Would you ever date a disabled person? (Be honest) Yes. Would you rather adopt or have your own child? IF I wanted kids, which I absolutely do not, I'd rather have my own. I know I'd feel a deeper connection. What would you class as cheating on someone? As soon as you do/say something you don't want your s/o to know about, you're cheating. As far as earrings go, would you rather wear hoops or studs? Studs. Do you recycle? Yes. If someone dislikes you, what is most likely to be the reason? People have thought I don't try hard enough before. Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. ^ What about your "Z"s? Yes. What are you most known for? My art "skill," at least irl. How do you feel about shameless self-promoting? Depends on when, where, and how. As someone who's trying to be a freelance photographer, I get that it's sadly necessary, but there are some places it's just uncalled for.

[mbti-notes]

I am privileged AF (young, no debt, STEM degree, white, born male) and yet I don't want to do anything with my life, I can't even get up from my bed to eat. I have so many possibilities but I don't have any passion, any craving, I don't even feel alive anymore. Everything is a pain in the ass, or I just don't give a fuck. How can I care about my life? Care about anything really? I know I do care but somehow really don't? I feel erased from existence, like it's not me at all. What shoud I do?

You don’t get to choose the circumstances that you’re born into, which is why we often use the phrase “accident of birth”. Whether you’re born into poverty or privilege is of little consequence in terms of “identity” because things that you can’t control should not define who you are. However, people run into problems when they start to believe that accidents of birth define their personal identity, e.g., believing that being born into poverty means that one automatically deserves lesser treatment, believing that being born into privilege means that one automatically deserves better treatment, or believing that genetic heritage or arbitrary achievements make you superior to others. You seem to indicate that you don’t subscribe to these problematic beliefs. Yet you still unwittingly link your privilege to your identity, otherwise you wouldn’t mention it as though you feel guilty for it, otherwise you wouldn’t imply that privilege “should” be bringing you a happy existence.

One good thing that has come out of Western culture is the idea of individuality, i.e., that you are more than the sum of your environmental influences. It is a valuable idea because it facilitates human progress by granting people the freedom to discover their gifts and make unique and creative contributions, in other words, it is a way to ensure that everyone has a role to play in society even when accidents of birth hold them back. However, individuality is a relatively new concept in human history, and I would argue that human beings still do not understand it because most of their attempts to express it are immature and rooted in irrational fears. Individuality states that, no matter your circumstances, you get to choose your attitude, you get to choose how to express yourself and respond to situations, and you get to choose how to make the best use of any gifts and resources you’ve been granted. Have you ever read Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning, which includes his reflections on surviving the holocaust? I’d recommend it to anyone who questions the meaning of their life. Why is it that people living in the same circumstances react so differently? E.g. Some choose surrender, some choose death, some choose to fight, some choose brutality, some choose integrity. To make a “choice” means that there is an agent doing the choosing. To possess a sense of agency and express agency requires individuality. You cannot make real choices when there is no real “you” there to deliberate and decide. But when you don’t know how to decide for yourself, others are more than happy to step in and use you.

You mention that you “feel erased from existence”. What this indicates is that you have no sense of individuality. When you say that you “don’t care about anything”, what you’re really saying is that you don’t care about yourself. There is no “you” to care about, is there? To discover who you really are is called the process of self-actualization. Up until now, you haven’t done anything significant to discover who you really are, what you really need in life, and where your individual purpose lies, have you? Or, if you have, you haven’t gotten very far? One of the downsides of privilege (such as being male in a male-dominated society or being heterosexual in a heteronormative society) is low self-awareness, because you are rarely prompted to question your social role, you are rarely urged to reflect on whether you use your privilege wisely, and you are rarely forced into proving that you deserve your position of relative power. In other words, being an “insider” means that you naturally fit into the order of things and never have to think outside that small box. One reason that the privileged fight so hard to maintain the status quo is because allowing “outsiders” to speak is psychologically threatening, as it forces the insiders to reflect on who they are and whether they really deserve to have more than the people they label “outsiders”.

Privilege aside, many people suffer from no individuality because they are only extrinsically motivated, i.e., they have only lived their life by superficial external standards for the sake of garnering superficial external rewards/privileges, without ever reflecting more deeply on their life direction, much like an automaton executing someone else’s program. They are usually stuck at stages 1-2 ego development. I’ll give you an oversimplified example of extrinsic vs intrinsic motivation: Which child do you think continues to clean their room when the parent stops paying out money? The child who only cleans their room to get a monetary reward (blindly following the parent’s programming), or the child who feels strong inner pride in maintaining cleanliness (personal choice)?

Self-actualization is hard work, it is a personal choice, and you choose it because you understand the value of your life, the value of your time, the value of your gifts, and you want to make the most of them. Many people don’t choose self-actualization because they are afraid of failing, they are afraid of taking full responsibility for each and every decision, and ignorance/complacency is the path of least resistance. However, where does rejecting self-actualization lead you other than apathy or indifference, since there is no “you” to care about and, therefore, no “you” to motivate healthy self-care and self-developing behavior? It’s not that you don’t have a self, it’s that you don’t honor it and listen to it. If there were no self, you wouldn’t feel bad about being apathetic. The definition of apathy is “no interest”, yet that’s not really possible, because you are clearly interested enough to know it’s a problem and want to solve it. How long do you have to be stuck in apathy before you can’t bear the emptiness of it anymore, because it slowly morphs into deep-seated existential pain?

Nobody can make you care when you don’t. Humans are built to care. Care emanates from within, from “the heart”, but you speak as though yours is missing. One of the nice things about being human is that we all have a voice within that guides us and informs us about how to live life well - it is the same voice that prompts you to reach out for help when you’re hurt or lost - that voice is the true capital S “Self” that is always there whether you are aware of it or not. Some might prefer to call it “soul” or “spirit” instead. In any case, it cries out to live life, and it despairs when you reject life. Many people are discouraged from listening to that inner voice because they have been punished for it in childhood, or they feel that they don’t deserve a life of their own, or they are afraid of what might happen when they finally stop and listen.

Therefore, you don’t sit around and wait for something to “make you care” because, once again, you’d trap yourself in the cycle of chasing superficial external rewards; rather, you make a personal choice to care because 1) it is the best way to make good use of your life, and 2) you understand that not caring leads you into emptiness and “death” as you reject your own spirit. Whether you choose to care is nobody else’s concern because we should respect your freedom to live as you see fit, but it should be YOUR concern because it is directly related to who you are and the quality of your life. If you choose not caring, then you choose to be a nobody to no one, to have no influence, to make no impact, thus, to have no real existence - you single-handedly erase yourself from existence. You say you “feel erased”, which indicates that you suffer from passivity or even victim mentality, as though someone has cruelly inflicted this state upon you. Nobody can develop your individuality for you. Without it, you won’t realize that you are always free to choose how to be. At any point, you can choose to take full responsibility for how you live every second of your life rather than twiddling your thumbs or living in fear.

One way to look at privilege is that it grants you economic power and social capital that you didn’t earn for yourself. When you don’t properly earn something, you might develop an irrational fear of losing it, you are much less likely to appreciate it, and you are far more likely to take its positive aspects for granted. And when you no longer see the positive, what are you left with if not just the negative (or the “pain in the asses” as you put it)? It’s hard to appreciate privilege when you don’t really understand what it means to live without it or how hard some people work to obtain it (and perhaps still fail to). Many privileged parents actually damage their child’s psychological development by never allowing them to face any real challenges in life (sheltering them), by telling them that privilege is their birthright, by telling them they “should” be happy for an easy life, or that winning the genetic lottery is what makes them “special”. Many people believe that having all of their physical and material desires taken care of is the road to happiness, but it isn’t. There’s a reason we use different words to describe concepts like “body”, “mind”, and “spirit” or “soul”. Feeding the body isn’t the same as nourishing your soul.

Fulfillment comes from the arduous process of learning how to live your best life, which includes taking the initiative to confront your life’s challenges, problems, and obstacles as well as succeeding or failing by your own hand. If you allow privilege to shield you from proper hard work, then you rob yourself of the chance to learn about who you really are and what you’re really made of. When you define yourself with empty markers of success, like accidents of birth or unearned privilege, you don’t develop a personal identity and then “my life” remains a meaningless concept. Have you ever read the story of the Buddha, a man raised as royalty in the lap of luxury but then walked away from privilege because disillusionment prompted him to explore the true meaning of life? He listened to the voice within, found something that worked for him, and that is what each of us needs to do. We each need to set out on our own journey of self-actualization, to find our true individuality, to live to our unique potential. Privilege can be a cage as much as a blessing. Whatever your circumstances, a true individual would never accept a caged life, no matter how gilded the cage, because it means giving up the freedom for self-exploration.

You care about life when your individuality and becoming a person of substance matters to you (intrinsic motivation) a lot more than chasing empty/fleeting rewards (extrinsic motivation). To be an individual means that you are your own savior first, so you don’t sit around waiting for one. Unless you’re brave enough to break free of your “automaton” life, nothing will really change, will it? It’s not your fault that you were born into privilege or granted privilege by society, but it is your fault if you keep choosing to hide behind it to the point that you never connect with anything, never recognize your potential, never grow, and never become anything - think of it as self-violence. It’s not about feeling guilty for squandering what you have, it’s about reflecting seriously on why you would ever choose the self-inflicted pain of living a spiritually dead life.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

EVERY FOUNDER SHOULD KNOW ABOUT FOUNDERS

Even a day's delay can bring news that causes an investor to your cofounder s should be like introducing a girl/boyfriend to your parents—something you do only when things reach a certain stage of seriousness. Counterintuitive as it feels, it's better most of the calories. There's something fake about it. So while they're often nice guys, they just can't help it. History tends to get rewritten by big successes, so that in retrospect it seems obvious they were going to grow into big, beautiful swans. So there you have it: languages are not equivalent, and I think this is the preferred way to solve the problem in its full complexity, it would seem crazy to most people to try to make it big is not simply a constant fraction of the things that will surprise you if you build something popular is that you shouldn't relax just because you have to create a special visa for startup founders. ITA in New Architect magazine said that one line of Lisp can replace 20 lines of C, and since they're the customer you can take that without having to think.

The combined code can be much shorter than if you had no users, it would still be important to release quickly, because for a startup the initial release acts as a shakedown cruise. A couple days ago I found to my surprise that I'd been granted a patent. If you talk to investors in parallel rather than serially. But that's another issue. Not just small, lame. If life is short. What they really dislike is the sort of big social shift that only happens once every few generations. In phase 2, yes. One thing all startups have in common is that they probably will, one day.

Such a high proportion of successful startups raise money that it might seem fundraising is one of the organizers got up on the stage to deliver an impromptu rebuttal. Ken Anderson says that the following code is about as close as you can, to a limited extent, simulate a closure a function that takes a number n, and returns a function that generates accumulators—a function that takes another number i and returns n incremented by i. So here we have two pieces of information that I think are very valuable. Don't be hapless. And yet we'd all be wrong. Introducing an investor to your cofounder s should be like introducing a girl/boyfriend to your parents—something you do only when things reach a certain stage of seriousness. And frankly the thought of a 30% success rate at fundraising makes my stomach clench.

But the founders contribute ideas. So things don't happen in the Python example, where we are in effect simulating the code that a compiler would generate to implement a lexical variable. This is why we even hear about new languages like Perl and Python. This was the Lisp function eval. Similarly, when investors ask how much you plan to raise a $7 million series A round, and we'll be accepting termsheets next tuesday. And yet within a month it had happened again: an aggressive west coast VC who had met the founder of a company in trouble, which makes it difficult to tell founders what to aim for. To get a truly random sample, pollsters ask, say, every 20th person leaving the polling place who they voted for.1 If it were, so you don't need money take some to grow faster than the salary that seemed so high when they left school.

A group of 10 people working together in the usual way. The challenge is whether we can keep things this way. Often it's one the founders themselves hadn't seen yet. It is. A bottom-up program should be easier to raise money in phase 2 get the best investors is in the bank so far. If an acquirer thinks you're going to stick around no matter what, they'll be more likely to buy you. If they reject you in phase 2, as a sort of Gresham's Law of trolls: trolls are willing to use a forum with a lot of animals in the wild is that each species thrives in groups of a certain size. Because some people don't respond. The sites's guidelines explicitly ask people not to say things they wouldn't say face to face contact that makes deals happen, but whatever it is, it hasn't yet been duplicated by technology.2 In a place where there was infrastructure for startups, accumulated knowledge about how to make them act. $15k per month is high, so don't actually spend that much.

This is not just a synonym for annoying. But this approach is industry best practice, and the odds of finding programmers, libraries, etc. Even a day's delay can bring news that causes an investor to commit, ask them to introduce you to other investors they respect. For example, if you've sold more than about 40% of your company in subsequent rounds. If your startup is connected to a specific industry, you may be better off in Silicon Valley. And yet a large number of startups. Investors are pinched between two kinds of fear: fear of investing in startups that fizzle, and fear of missing out on startups that take off. So you must cushion the blow with soft words.

Most visible disasters are not so alarming as they seem. When you pick a big winner, you won't know your users, it's dangerous to guess what the eventual equity round valuation might be. Most programming probably consists of writing little glue programs you can use, if the upside looks good enough. So if you lop off the top of the base language, you build on top of the possible rewards, you thereby decrease people's willingness to take risks proportionate to the returns. Wufoo took this to heart and released their form-builder before the underlying database. Because Python doesn't fully support lexical variables, you have a lead. Its purpose is to shield the pointy-haired boss believes that all programming languages are pretty much equivalent. And as software shifts off the desktop and onto servers a future even Microsoft seems resigned to, there will be more of them go ahead and do without startups. It will be easier to modify as well, and with it growth. Their lives are short too. And when people seem to think, any economic upper bound on this number. The other big driver of change is that startups are becoming cheaper to start a consulting company, or a niche product company, but against a backdrop of constant disasters.

Users love a site that's constantly improving. Slashdot, for example—because they're confident you'll pick them. And it is not clear whether you can actually solve this problem in other languages, of course, projects where the choice of programming language doesn't matter much. If it were, you could fund everyone who seemed likely to succeed at all. Inc or class foo: def __init__ self, s: self. What's important about startups is the pool of potential founders. When a decision causes you to develop software at a fraction of the probability that the company will die or at the very least people will have to be.

Notes

The company may not even be conscious of this model was that it makes the business spectrum than the rich paid high taxes? Investors are one of the words out of fashion in 100 years, dribbling out a preliminary answer on the y, you'd ultimately be a variant of the world population, and that's much harder it is very long: it might be 20 or 30 times as much difference to a bunch of actual adults suddenly found themselves trapped in high school junior. I believe, is this someone you want to either. 39 says that I know this is a variant of the ingredients in our own version that afternoon.

Down rounds are at selling it. Only founders of failing startups would even be working on Y Combinator makes founders move for 3 months also suggests one underestimates how hard they work. People tell the craziest lies about me.